Have you considered skipping the headache of a big wedding. Well, there are a lot of benefits to doing just that:

• Eloping saves gobs of time and energy. Let's face it, planning a big wedding, with all the guests and the logistics involved, is a major endeavor which consumes humongous chucks of time. All that planning puts everybody under a lot of stress, and stress is an acid that eats at what would normally be a tranquil engagement, frequently igniting a lot of arguments. Think of all the time you could save, stress you could avoid and happiness you could preserve by eloping instead, followed by a romantic honeymoon vacation somewhere.

• Eloping can save you or your family BIG, BIG, Bucks. If you didn't already know, let me clue you in: weddings aren't cheap. In fact they can cost many multiple thousands of dollars. Why? Well most weddings entail hiring a photographer, buying flowers and dresses and renting a church or some other venue. Then there are things like DJs, Bands and oodles of other things that thin even the most hefty bank account faster than the tax-happy politicians in Washington, DC. Even so-called "budget weddings" can easily cost four or five thousand dollars. If you elope, perhaps getting married at my residence or a nearby park in my hometown of beautiful Peterborough, NH, it doesn't cost much at all. Heck, If your parents were going to go into debt to finance a big wedding, maybe you can ask them to come to witness your elopement wedding and send you off on a terrific honeymoon with only half the money they would have spent on a wedding. Another possibility: elope and put the money that your parents were going to spend on a big wedding into special Certificate Deposit, with the title of "The Down-payment On Our Future House". Now that's money wisely spent!

• Eloping can avoid the spectacle of family in-fighting. Hey, no family is perfect. It seems when you get your entire extended family together, in one place at one time, those old rivalries, jealousies and feuds tend to come to the service and tarnish what should otherwise be a joyful event. If you elope, all that drama can be avoided. As an added bonus, you also don’t have to worry hurting someone's feelings because one person was invited and another one wasn’t. Plus you don’t have to fret about the awkwardness of inviting people you can't stand because you feel obligated or pressured to do so.

• Eloping adds intimacy. Some couples, who have had big weddings, have commented afterwards that it seemed like they were in a big production Broadway Play rather than a special time for publicly committing to the person they love. By eloping and having a small, simple ceremony with no one but the two of you or maybe a very select few of your closest family and friends, the focus of your wedding tends to be less on the extravaganza and more about the two of you and your choice to be with one another. This alone can really enhance the the intimacy of your wedding experience.

• Eloping can add the exciting element of romance and naughtiness to the ceremony. Some have spent their whole lives dreaming of the big wedding they would someday have and there is certainly nothing wrong with fulfilling that dream, but some others fantasize instead of the romance and passion of running away with the person that they love. For those people, an elopement wedding can be a dream made reality.

THE NEGATIVES OF ELOPING:

A wise person always weighs the positives of any decision against the negatives. Although there are a lot of benefits to eloping, you should do so only after thinking about some of the potential drawbacks:

• There might be some hurt feelings. If your parents and closest friends don't witness your wedding, some may be hurt that they weren't there to see you getting married.

• People may not be accepting. Depending on the personalities of your family and your in-laws, they may not take the news of your elopement with gracious congratulations. Once again, depending on the personalities of your families, some family members need a big wedding to consummate the bonding process between the respective families of the bride and the groom. For them, without a big expensive wedding, the bonding will never exist or will be greatly delayed.

• For some, it can be anti-climatic. Eloping can be extremely exciting for many couples, but for others, a big, formal and expensive wedding helps them to feel that their marriage will be more enduring. If the pizazz of a big wedding excites you, eloping can feel less important and this may bother you as time goes on.

• You may get very few or no gifts. This may be a big price to pay if you don't already have a home established with all the pots, pans, towels, linen etc you need to get things going. This may be a bigger price to pay than you can endure, so it's something to take into consideration. On the other hand, some parents will encourage you to elope and offer you a cash incentive to do so--cash that can be used to set up house. It's good for you and it's good for them since many parents would rather see you use their money to purchase things that will last for years and make your lives more comfortable than spend it on a wedding that last one day.

• You can hurry up marry the wrong person. Unless you've already been living together or have been engage for a year or more, eloping is something usually done spontaneously. As a result you can deny yourself the time necessary for rationally deciding (click HERE for Divorce Inoculation Questions) whether or not you really want to be married to this person. Spending the time and enduring the stress necessary to plan a big wedding can allow you to really ponder what you’re doing and to decide whether or not the marriage is really the right thing for you.

What about a hybrid?

Not sure eloping is right for you, but the idea of a big wedding gives you the heebie-jeebies? Well you can always compromise and harness the benefits of eloping without risking all of the negatives. A very small and romantic ceremony, with only a handful of people as witnesses, followed by a romantic and passionate honeymoon may be a good solution. You could also elope, and then afterwards, throw a big post-marriage party when you return from your honeymoon so that your friends and family feel included. In the final analysis, you should do what,s right for the two of you, given your circumstances and family dynamics.